Category Archive for "Things To Remember"

Miracles Happen When I Get Out of the Way

That’s been my reminder these past few weeks. (Getting out of the way.) I have a tendency when funk hits the fan to get in there. To stress. To get upset, in the very charming woe-is-me-Life-is-out-to-get-me kind of way. (Really, you should see me some time. You’d probably have a lot more compassion for your own bad days. I know, you’re all surprised. I may have some wisdom and mindfulness, but I also still have an ego to work with and she’s a tough nut to crack.) But the past few weeks have been totally breathtaking in those subtle ways we don’t usually realize even when we are paying attention. Let me start from the beginning…. First, Justin was in a car accident. Someone ran a red light and he plowed the poor guy over. Because I had been doing my own practice of mindfulness, meditation, and breathing, this totally…

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100+ Things I Hope to Teach My Son

There’s this list going around the interwebs of 101 things to teach a daughter. As with all things online, everyone has an opinion, thinks it’s wonderful, thinks it’s horrible, thinks it contradicts itself (cuz life – or we as parents – never do that). But mostly I just found it thought-provoking. Like what are all the big and little things I hope to teach my son? What do I hope he picks up from us, others, or Life? What might I save him some time (or heartache) by showing him now? I found myself going back and forth, between that maternal desire to impart to him the wisdom that might allow him to improve upon what my generation has done, and that cautious mindfulness that reminds me I really don’t know jack about what he needs in his own life compared to my limited perspective of his journey. But despite…

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There is NO Excuse for Neglecting Yourself (let me show you)

Your idea of self-care might be as simple as showering when you’ve got little ones crawling the walls. It might be as basic as drinking enough water or remembering to eat. It might be as nurturing as a massage or some quiet time to yourself. But how it looks is inconsequential to your willingness to make it happen. Yes, I can BS with the best of them and complain about all sorts of “reasons” why I’m rocking the self-neglect wagon. But at least I can smell my own BS. I know it’s all a lame justification for what’s really holding me back. And of all the things I’m nice and gentle when I talk about – honey, this isn’t one of them. So please allow me to speak the truth for a second here, especially if it means it might get you caring about yourself, finally. Excuse #1: I don’t…

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Crazy Moments are Just Crazy Moments (A Message From My Past Self)

Pssst! I’ve got a brand new e-guide coming out on December 9th. Signup for my newsletter to get first dibs! I love when I write things on my blog or Facebook or elsewhere in this case, only to find them a week, a month, 6 months later and at just the right time. It’s like wisdom to myself, from myself, and always in the perfect timing. This happened to me awhile back. Skype wasn’t working for a very important parenting e-course interview, with a very important person. I was swimming in my own triggers of “not being good enough” after some hoped-for cash didn’t come in. I was coming off a meltdown over improperly buttered toast. Yeah, it wasn’t good. Then I got an email from myself, something I had scheduled a year before when I was feeling a lot of exhaustion and hoping it was coming to an end…

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My Retreat Turned Into Retreating

I’ve got my feet up, my heart out, my head on. I’m not sure if I’m ready or just resolute, but I’m on my way. Confronting my resistance with 7 days of all day, every day meditation. It might blow my mind to bits. But that might be a good thing. That was the photo and those were the words rattling around within me Friday. Right before I turned my phone off, handed it to my hubby, and arrived at the ashram. I’m not sure how to describe the week that followed. People like to ask if I “had a good time”, but “good” is not exactly the word that fits. It wasn’t bad. But it wasn’t exactly good either. Useful. That was the adjective I settled on. It was a useful week. Enlightening. Challenging. Helpful in many ways. Heart-wrenching in others. I knew I’d be confronting my resistance to…

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My Wisdom, My Bullshit (and showing up for the right one)

I leave in just a couple hours, and I haven’t packed or even done laundry. I’ve been rushing through all the things I need to do before I leave because once I’m gone I’m actually going to be 100% gone. Off the grid. Seven days. Nothing but meditation. No email. No Facebook or Instagram. No internet whatsoever. I’m not even going to bring my phone. [Insert wide-eyed look of fear here.] Unless there is a bonafide emergency – something that (heaven forbid) involves a hospital or a mortuary – I will have zero contact with anyone but my own Self and the few others who will be on this little “retreat” with me. (That alone is a big deal. I can’t remember ever being out of contact with Justin or Zeb for more than 24 hours.) It’s not really a retreat, in the way we’ve come to see retreats. It’s…

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Practicing the Empty Nest (or Our Month of Dates)

Zeb’s been out of town for two weeks now (which should show you about how behind in blogging I am). He comes home next week, just one day shy of his 14th birthday. These trips of his are almost old hat for us now, except this time he not only flew alone but also navigated his first layover/plane change. It came about after a lot of discussion and even some practice runs following our convoluted and time-sensitive directions through a busy mall. The first thing people ask us when he leaves town is, “Do you miss him?” The first two weeks my answer was, “No”, which I’m pretty sure puts me in last place for Mom of the Year. But the thing is missing him would be like saying we wish he were here. And if he is having a blast, exploring and being with family and friends, why would…

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There is No Such Thing as Square One

I connected with a sweet, beautiful, wonderful client recently who was feeling overwhelmed and set back by life. It’s a frustrating feeling, to set your heart and soul on a goal, or even just a new perspective…to feel the shifts happening in your life, the forward movement finally taking place. And then to experience an upheaval, a new challenge, a serious trigger, the whole of your world throwing up in your face. Then to feel yourself losing all that ground. (If you’re going to fall, fall with pizzazz!) Three steps forward, two back again…or four back it can seem. We experience that backward slide in our own inner work and then we couple it with stories about What That Means. And the stories we tell ourselves about it SEEM true. Our big, desperate, self-deprecating emotions like to tell us it’s real, we’ve just lost out again, Life is against us,…

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Howling at the Moon and the Things Captured

A full moon, a super moon, sumer solstice, and the lead-up to Mercury Retrograde. Oh I was feeling it all. And this time I let myself go, let myself create a little #howlfest to sink into. I circled with new friends and allowed tears to flow, even though they had no obvious source. I leaned in and trusted the cleansing process that I could feel was taking place. I rested. I drank cheap wine from a mason jar and watched stupid movies and was okay with that. I drew myself in with my guys, disconnecting for the weekend, and allowing ourselves to head to a matinee, to laugh in the truck, to make new dishes, and read paperbacks I found in the laundry room. I dove into a drum circle, and took place in the changing of the guards, the drumming to the setting of the sun and the rising…

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Who or what are you “trying to love”?

But, of course, what is not said in this quote is how to bring into your heart this extraordinary thing called love. How do we love the guy that flipped us off with our kid in the car? How do we love the dog shit we found in our shoe this morning? How do we love the cockroach that just crawled across our glass? We don’t. Notice Krishnamurti isn’t saying you need to do anything, such as “loving” someone or something. He’s saying you need to allow love in and then your experience of the world – including the other driver, the dog shit, the roach even (or so I’m told – yet to get there myself on that one) – will do the changing right before your eyes. Who or what are you trying to love? Why are you working from the outside in?

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