How can Life possibly be against you?

Buenos Dias from #keylargo. May your day be bright, colorful, and calm. <3

Have you ever had one of those days where it literally seemed like Life was out to get you – and only you – melodrama and all?

{Don’t front. I know you have. ;) }

I had one yesterday.

It was a travel day and I’ve learned that travel days are a huge instigator to anything I need to DIG IN to. I’ve gotten proactive, planning meals ahead, taking time to ground myself, bring along my essential oils to keep centered.

It worked on the first travel day. But two travel days in a row I was ill-equipped for.

So my son woke up cranky…I’ve got this. I get it. I’m not a morning person either.

Breathe. Surrender. Keep flowing.

Then the fan belt began to shred. Actually felt good through this. My husband is a rockstar, noticed it, changed it, back on the road in no time.

Aaah. Feeling good. Gratitude through the bumps and all.

Then I started getting hungry.

The man-child had eaten the day’s lunch the night before (when do they STOP eating?!). We were hours behind schedule. No healthy food options in sight. Then a cranky son again. And I felt the spiral happening.

Oh you know the spiral…that one thing rubs you the wrong way and you start to inch downward. The next thing rubs a little harder and you slide a little farther. Then something comes along and you find yourself spinning.

I was spinning. In my head {because where else do we spin?}.

Thoughts of “why can’t he…” and “no one but me…”. Grasping for my anchors to keep me stable. Slipping into the backseat. Listening to the words of my own guides and gurus tell me what I. Do. Not. Want. To hear. Nothing getting through to me.

My spinning went on through the evening.

Needing easy food and feeling as though Life was conspiring against me to not offer something convenient with paleo options {no Chipotle?!}. Like Life was deliberately causing the ache in my neck. Like Life was intentionally making it impossible to feel grounded. Like I’m not allowed. Like Life intentionally sent that guy to hit our truck in the parking lot and rush off while I stood watching him. Like that.

And on and on that shit went.

You know, you’ve been there. That dizzying spiral.

Then that same guide and guru, that same voice that can cut through my bullshit, found me. A quote I stumbled across to calm my exact thoughts of “Life is against me”.

Life cannot be against you, because you are Life itself. Life can only be against your Ego protection. – Mooji

There are some days when only the Scarlett O'hara approach will work. I will go to bed and think about all this tomorrow. #lifeontheroad #toomuchofthisday

It was like a slam to my ego, but a gentle kind of slam. I took it in, wrapped it around my heart {and my heart around it} and went to bed with it. I call it the Scarlett O’Hara method – “I’ll think about this tomorrow” – except I know my spirit really thinks about it all night. I have this agreement with Life, that anything too big will make me tired, and that’s when my spirit will go to work. When my spinning head is out of the way. ;)

And I woke up understanding.

Life cannot be against me.

Life isn’t even really “against” my Ego protection, in the sense of warring against it.

Life just will not cooperate with my bullshit, is all. It doesn’t jive. It can’t. It will bump against it again and again because it can’t not. It will take me back to that shattered place because that protection{projection} NEEDS to shatter in order to come back to peace.

{Life is not against me. I have been against the natural, organic flow of Life!}

Again and again, this is our work.

To allow what does not belong to be shattered. To expose the raw and tender places beneath to the Light.

To fall out of our stories and into the the Truth. Over and over.

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