Plans | The Organic Sister

Carlsbad Caverns (and exhaustion)

April 8, 2010 By TheOrganicSister 13 Comments

Yes, it was amazing. Surreal, actually. A bit like being on a movie set (especially when you walk up on the diner and gift shop 750+ feet underground – seriously?). It *almost* “took my breath away”…but it’s not as if I can live there so it wouldn’t count anyway.

The formations were incredible and the information we all took away from the day is fairly immense. And we – including Zeb – can tell you the difference between the stalactite, stalagmite, soda straw, popcorn, column, flowstone and drapery formations, how each type was formed, as well as when the park was founded (1930), how our modern culture first discovered it (a 16 year old hiker following the bats) and what mountains of bat guano smell like (wet synthetic baby diapers).

We took one guided tour and walked the rest ourselves. I was much more impressed by the self-guided tours, namely the sheer size of the caverns. I couldn’t help but find the irony in the paved walkways and LED lights when the tour guide discussed how previous generations left burn marks on the rock and how we know better know than to disturb the area now. And I discovered just how weak my knees were as we traversed down the switchbacks. Yikes.

I’m still having a hard time at the end of the day. I’m emotionally, mentally and physically drained. And THAT is the exact moment when Zeb needs one-on-one time (or one-on-two time, since he prefers both our attentions). There are heavy moments when I don’t think I’m cut out for this lifestyle, but can’t imagine going back to a home. I know I need to strike a balance between downtime and “Going going going” but it’s hard when there is so much to see and do and we honestly don’t know how long we’ll have to do it. There is also a lot to be said about HOW we’re doing it that I think I’ll save for another post.

Our plan was and still is to find “a home” along the road. We’ve originally given ourselves one year to travel and search, but it seems impossible that we’ll feel “done” or ready to decide in just 11 short months with so much left unseen. I suppose we’ll just finally stumble across a place and not feel like leaving until one day we realize it’s our home. Until then the plan remains for the three of us to reevaluate the whole shebang at the end of 12 months. And maybe somewhere along the road I’ll hit my stride, fall out of “vacation mode” and find this isn’t so fucking exhausting after all.

More photos here and Justin’s account here.

Filed Under: Life on the Road Tagged With: carlsbad caverns, caves, examples of unschooling, exhaustion, hiking, HSP, new mexico, plans, RV transitioning

Highly-Sensitive Transitioning: Before The Move

January 30, 2010 By TheOrganicSister 14 Comments

Zeb, making a list of our dreams: places and people we want to see
and things we want to do on the road.

When we first started discussing the decision to travel full-time and eventually settle outside of Vegas, we included Zeb. How could we not? He’s one-third of our family and his experience will be as life-changing as ours.

So, we sat down. We talked over our situation and our choices as best we could without overwhelming him or stressing out an easily-stressed soul. We told him every pro and con of full-time RVing we could think of, we gave him a timeline for being on the road but were honest that it could change, we discussed the potential challenges. And we asked what he thought.

He was hesitant, for sure. Thoughtful and questioning. But after some time, and a promise we’d make room for his Legos, he told us it would work for him.

And then he was excited…for about a week. That’s when his real transitioning began.

Zeb is an emotional, highly-sensitive child. He creates strong attachments to animals, friends and family, as well as things that hold special significance. For years he kept his school reports and certificates on his walls because it reminded him of *something* good from those difficult years. So it’s really no wonder that this transition – away from loved ones, best friends, his hometown, all that he knows, even his pets – would hit him hard.

All at once he was torn between sadness and anger. This isn’t to say he wasn’t simultaneously excited. But he realized how much he would miss his friends and family. He worried that he’d be bored. Truthfully, I think he was a bit afraid of such a Huge Unknown. In his ten years, he’s experienced some pretty difficult stuff and it’s left him leaning heavily toward the hesitant side of life. Now here we were, and he was feeling as if the security we’ve built for ourselves was being stripped away. It’s a big world out there and it’s already proven to sometimes be scary.

This went on for awhile. Some days – many days – I didn’t handle it well. Truthfully, my own excitement was building and I was feeling resentful for his raining over my parade. I didn’t want to be pulled into the emotional upset and away from the budding joy. Internally, I didn’t think I had the energy to handle it.

On those days I tried to rationalize with him, remind him how much fun we’d have, how many more friends we’ll see and make, how many things we’ll have the opportunity to do. I took lots of deep breaths and left the room countless times. It’s not that I didn’t understand him. It’s that I was too wrapped up in my own expectations to react to his needs.

He doesn’t need to be rationalized with or reminded that he had once agreed. He needs to mourn what we are leaving behind, so that he can be prepared to move ahead.

Zeb has always needed a slow transition. He’s slow to get out of bed, slow to stop one thing and start another. We work with this by giving him plenty of notice before we leave, before we eat, before company comes.

And this anger and sadness was the beginning phase of a very big transition. All he needed from me was a place to vent, some validation over what will surely suck and some patience. So I finally stopped rationalizing or talking him out of his emotions. I stopped trying to fix it. (Wait. I thought I learned this one already?)

I allowed myself to be his emotional punching bag.

He needed a safe place to let it all out. And with lots of deep breaths and quiet reminders to myself to keep my mouth shut, I became that place. Sometimes he yelled, other times he cried. Sometimes he questioned and voiced concern. Some days he talked excitedly and made plans. At one point he blamed us for ruining his life and called us names, hating us with conviction. And that’s about when I was suddenly able to see past my own expectations and look with compassion on my son who was grieving a loss in advance.

And as soon as I managed to stay present and compassionate during his storm, it passed. In a matter of an hour he went from total meltdown to cuddling in our arms. In the end he gave us a look that resembled a Thank You, a hug that said I Love You Too and he was off to conquer the day without the heavy emotional load dragging him down.

I’m not about to assume we’ve seen the end. He’s not that kind of kid. And he still has his moments of fear amid the moments of excitement, although they aren’t as explosive now. But if I can remember to breath and not take it personally, I know we’ll get through them, too.

There is plenty more to say on the subject of transitioning/moving/traveling with a highly-sensitive child. You could probably consider this Part One.

Filed Under: Life on the Road, Organic Parenting Tagged With: anger, authenticity, change, Connecting, expectations, HSP, plans, transitioning, Zeb

Benny’s Big Reveal!

January 8, 2010 By TheOrganicSister 44 Comments

The RV remodeling/renovations are complete! Four months of time, countless trips to the hardware and auto parts store and more work than we anticipated (when is it ever less?) and the only thing left to do is convert Benny the Brave to run on waste veggie oil (WVO) and move a few things in.

All Before and After shots here

It’s still a little stark, but I’m seeing it as a wide open canvas, to be filled with memories along the way. I’m thinking of embroidering the shower curtain and front window curtains, hanging photos and finding unique items to decorate the walls all while on the road.

Interior:

Removed vinyl wallpaper from ceiling
Refinished ceiling
Replaced broken paneling on walls
Cleaned more smoke residue off the walls than I thought possible
Removed old carpet
Removed microwave
Built doors for cupboard where microwave was
Painted bright white to open space
Painted and hung new curtain rods (made from dowels)
Replaced vinyl shower walls with panels
Replaced peeling countertops and tabletop
Installed secondhand flooring
Replaced vinyl backing on seats
Sewed new seat cushion covers
Hung new curtains
Shampooed carpets and seats in front cab
Deep, deep, deep cleaning

Body/Engine/Technical:

New blackwater tank
Resealed the roof
Resealed and repaired drafts
New tires
Numerous engine leaks fixed
New shocks
New power steering pump
Glow plugs
Tuneup
New deep cycle batteries
Two 80 watt solar panels (will supply all electrical needs)
Lots of small misc things

Things soon to be added:

Rocket stove
Water filter
Hand-cranked blender
Waste veggie oil conversion
Our things! (clothing, pillows, blankets, games, etc)

We’re hoping to be in my mid- to late-February, with a few more weeks to adjust to the smaller spaces before we hit the road.

My favorite thing (other than the whole get-outta-dodge aspect)?

Our new home blessing hung over the door:

With our tiny RV and everyone we’re hoping to meet on the road,
I don’t think this will be a problem.

And because it just didn’t feel right not to, I updated my blog layout and header to reflect our new transition. If you’re in a Reader, be sure to come check it out!

Filed Under: Life on the Road Tagged With: blog stuff, change, DIY, lists, plans, RV

SO Big. SO Life Changing.

September 20, 2009 By TheOrganicSister 45 Comments

Are you just
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dying to know
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the big
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life changing
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decision?
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We’re moving!!

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Or rather, I should say, we’ll be on the move.

Meet Benny the Brave:

Here’s the deal: Justin is facing layoff within a month or so. He feels fairly certain he can scrounge up a few more months of work. But construction is grimmer than Vegas has ever seen. And he knows he’ll need to find work elsewhere. And with Benny, we can follow the work while we scope out new places to live.

Apparently, he’s been thinking about and researching going on the road for awhile. He approached me with the idea while at GVC and totally freaked me out. (I think Jeff Sabo’s talk at Good Vibrations on pursuing our own Passions pushed him over the edge.) But after thinking about it and talking it over with Zeb, we all started to feel really good about the idea. As soon as we made the decision together, things clicked into place and we found Benny immediately (although we took several more days to research and compare before coming back to him).
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Here are his specs:

1982 Winnebago Brave Series M-22RB – 22′
Chevy 6.2 L DIESEL engine with only 67k miles
Ugly as sin VERY retro
But cheap as DIRT (thank you poor economy)

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Some things he needs:

New air, oil and fuel filters
New tires (they’re okay but we’re not taking chances)
New blackwater tank
New fuel cap (we’re using a sock right now!)
A deep clean

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Some things he WANTS:

Veggie oil conversion (#1 after small maintenance)
Solar panels
Complete indoor remodel: new flooring, paint, storage, cushion, curtains (I’m totally inspired by Sara’s recent remodel)
Some outdoor sparkle…maybe some stenciled “Unschool Bus” or buttloads of bumper stickers

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We’re going to make a conscious effort to sell our home. Home values are down 60% and I’m not yet familiar with short sales. So, we could be looking at a foreclosure when the work stops. Scary, yes. But I’m trusting everything to work out for the best.

We’ll sell everything that we don’t absolutely love, store what we don’t absolutely need and tow the truck (with Justin’s tools) behind the RV. We’re also trying to create a way to accomodate as many of Zeb’s LEGOs as possible. (Eep!)

We’re thinking six more months until we’re on the road. Talk about revamping our Five Year Plan! Anyone interested in buying an urban homestead in the making?

ETA: More photos here.

Filed Under: Life on the Road Tagged With: change, dreams, goals, hopes, plans, RV, thefiveyearplan

Plan of Action

June 27, 2009 By TheOrganicSister

It’s a rare moment Justin and I get the opportunity to talk. You know, really talk – about finances, plans, etc. The kind of talk best done out of ear shot of a easily stressed and environmentally-sensitive kiddo. Earlier this week, we plopped ourselves on the bed and really hashed things out.

This discussion came about as we had been looking at our yard and really, really, really wanting to do more – more perennials, more raised beds, water catchment and graywater usage, more investment into a home and garden we weren’t sure we would be able to afford or remain in when/if Justin’s work runs dry. Is it worth the investment? Should we plop more money in this yard, only to give it away come as early as next spring? But what if work holds out and we’re able to keep to the plan? What if we’re putting off the enjoyment of where we are, in case of something that doesn’t even happen? How do we plan for such unknown variables? And how do we live in the meantime?

We’ve sat stuck for several months, idling at this inevitable fork in our minds. I felt myself reaching for a solution; something that would give me permission to move in either direction. I don’t even care which way we travel, just give me a damn course already!!

Our conversation swirled around a few main topics: Is it a waste of time to invest anything else in this place? If, come December, Justin finds himself unemployed what do we want to do? And how? Are we saving enough money? I’ll spare you the details and share with you our conclusions.
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Navigating the Fork:

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Before we looked at anything else, we had to look at where we want to be and how we want to get there. We don’t know where we want to be but we know it’s not here. However, we’re very particular about moving. Neither of us wish to move hastily or go into debt again. So we made the choice that come what may, until we have the savings to support our original “Five Year Plan“, we’re not budging.

If Justin gets laid off we’ll do whatever possible to remain in this home while we work toward our financial goals. If staying in our home becomes impossible, we’ll continue to stay in Vegas where we have career connections and family support. We are not going to move out of Vegas until we can do so debt-free. If things remain at the current pace, this will be in 4-5 years. But we’re going to try to expedite that process (explained below).
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Investing in the Present:

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Once we decided we were going to do whatever possible to stay in our current home, the choice to invest more into our garden and home came easier. We still had to decided what to invest and how. Perennial fruit-bearing, insectary and nitrogen-fixing plants, as well as animals, more raised beds and water catchment/greywater storage and usage encompass our desires.

In regards to plants, we’ve decided to invest in nitrogen-building and insectary plants first. These will support our annuals and general landscape over the next year, thus saving us time and money. Come winter, we’ll be able to judge when or if to add fruit-bearing perennials (who’s benefit would be farther off) based on the local economy. Raised beds will be done using only free and salvaged materials, although the soil will likely be purchased. Animals for eggs or manure and rain and greywater catchment will save us money soon after their initial investment making it a worthwhile endeavor now.
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Investing in the Future:

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Then came the real financial discussion. Are we saving enough and what can we do to save more? What options do we have if Justin is laid off and what are our options now?

Two decisions were made. The first: I’m going back to work. As an independent massage therapist, I can make good money seeing only one or two clients a week. I love my work and if I’m careful about who I see (no more deep tissue work) I will be able to work without injury to my back. I saw my first client yesterday and it went very well. This decision brings up a lot of other thoughts; perhaps I’ll blog more about it later.

The second decision is to reconsider a new online venture. It’s been something I’ve been mulling over for quite some time, and although it is a small initial investment, it will require much more of my time and energy to get off the ground. But its potential of passive income (even if to the smallest degree) once it’s established is great and will be a huge asset to our goals. I’m not going to go into details just yet but if all goes according to plan, I will be getting started within the next week.

So there you have it! I have a definitive course and plan of action, as well as feel so much more secure knowing we will be staying here as long as we possibly can. Not all of it is ideal but it feels good and stable, not to mention wise. And I love that I no longer have to feel so torn about pouring my heart and soul into my garden!

How is everyone else weathering the current economy? Anyone else deciding on new courses or making new plans?