Posts Tagged "ways to love yourself"

The More I Know Myself, The Less I Care

The more I know myself, really and deeply know my Self, the less I’m finding I care… I don’t care what I look like. I don’t care that I make mistakes. I don’t care that my thoughts go off on wild, unhelpful tangents. I don’t care that I get afraid or triggered. I don’t care to spend so much time Digging Deep. (Gasp! I know!) The more I know myself, the less I find I care about others too… I don’t care what others think of me. I don’t care if they agree or disagree with me. I don’t have endless opinions or fears on the choices they make either. And I don’t care if I’m accepted or rejected. (Yes, despite my equally strong drive to not blindly follow the norm, this was very much a big thing for me.) I just don’t have the energy anymore, let alone the…

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The Fear of Public Speaking and What It Really Boiled Down To

I realized recently that I don’t get scared speaking anymore. Not when I’m interviewing someone big or important, nor when I’m teaching my essential oil workshops. I used to get out of my mind scared: butterflies, tightness, heart racing, the constant urge to pee my pants (no joke), and crazy thoughts of all kind of madness that could ensue, which usually involved images of people with pitchforks. But without all those emotions and thoughts getting in the way I’ve found I actually have a strength and passion for teaching, presenting, and speaking. (If you had asked me that five years ago I would swallowed my tongue just thinking about it.) I’ve spoken to some pretty amazing people in my life, people I admire or had a mild crush on – Steven Tyler (!!), Ricki Lake, Dr. Peter Gray – all with various amounts of nerves and confidence leading up to…

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Before We Get the Opportunity To Change Anything, We First Get the Opportunity to Love It

I had a dream several years ago that I was describing to my doctor what was hurting in my body by describing the one thing that wasn’t: my toes. Then I woke up and as I went to stretch my stiff joints and aching muscles, I felt it….my freaking toes were throbbing. You have got to be kidding me. Pain has been nothing new to my experiences. Developing scoliosis at age 10, undergoing surgery at age 14 and chronic, even debilitating, degeneration of my body has since been a history I had long tolerated. But that summer, I was in almost constant pain. I was struggling to walk, losing feeling in my limbs and settling into a recognition that I was “disabled”, broken; that my current experience was my medical destiny. It’s hard not to feel resentful or depressed over something like that. I was awash in the emotional anguish…

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There is NO Excuse for Neglecting Yourself (let me show you)

Your idea of self-care might be as simple as showering when you’ve got little ones crawling the walls. It might be as basic as drinking enough water or remembering to eat. It might be as nurturing as a massage or some quiet time to yourself. But how it looks is inconsequential to your willingness to make it happen. Yes, I can BS with the best of them and complain about all sorts of “reasons” why I’m rocking the self-neglect wagon. But at least I can smell my own BS. I know it’s all a lame justification for what’s really holding me back. And of all the things I’m nice and gentle when I talk about – honey, this isn’t one of them. So please allow me to speak the truth for a second here, especially if it means it might get you caring about yourself, finally. Excuse #1: I don’t…

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Something Only For Yourself

When was the last time you had something only for you? Not something you did because you “should” do it… Not something you love and decide to turn into a business on the side… Not something you teach… Maybe something you don’t even share with the world? I’ve got entrepreneur in my blood. I’ve never had something I wasn’t sharing with the world. So in answers to the question of whether or not I’m going to be selling or teaching art at some point in the future, first let me say…hahahahahahahahaha. As if I know what I’m doing enough to share much of anything. And second, no. In fact, I’m consciously working on nurturing this as something I don’t “share”, don’t teach, don’t sell. It’s something just for me. To feed my soul. To nurture me. It’s mine, and maybe I’ll show my process from time to time, but only…

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Free To Never Notice

I shaved my head again last week. It wasn’t in a moment of enlightenment or courage this time. It didn’t bring with it all the ecstasy and liberation. This time it was done out of frustration toward myself, almost like “pulling my hair out”. I had noticed how attached I had become to my hair, how much I cared about how it was looking, what it portrayed, and what others might think about it. And that pissed me off. Old patterns die hard, and even after several years of feeling free of that one, it had snuck back in. And I was not okay with that. I was angry. Mostly at myself. So out of anger, I shaved it all off again. Like I said I didn’t feel so liberated and joyful this time around. Instead I felt horrible, ugly, and full of self-hatred. Yes, self-hatred – as I witnessed…

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Why is it so hard for you to receive?

I wander around department stores about once every 7 years, as evident by the two gift cards I’ve been carrying around for nearly that long. It wasn’t for a lack of trying that they hadn’t been spent. Justin and I had looked, but we don’t tend to find much of ourselves on their shelves. But my wallet needed cleaning out and the summer heat and humidity is sneaking up on us, and I set upon it, determined to spend these damn cards, knowing (hoping) I’d at least find a cami or a tank top. (Shopping is always an experience in itself for me. I could probably write about it alone, but that’s not what stole my attention that day.) I found what I had been looking for, and with a armful of stripes, totaled up my swag to find it just exactly what I needed to spend to get rid…

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Organic Wisdom :: What’s Pouring Out?

I like to share some of the quotes I post on Twitter and Facebook, with some of my expanded thoughts and feelings on it here. “Organic Wisdom” is what I have found speaking to me in those quiet moments, that guides me and that echoes Truth in my life. Please feel free to download, or share this image in any way you’d like. What you pour into a relationship, pours out. If you pour in empathy, love, compassion, patience, support, generosity, kindness, strength, self-respect…you will slowly begin to see those things pouring back out from those you love. What you pour into a child, pours out. If you pour in autonomy, respect, honor, presence and engagement, passion, kindness, generosity, honesty, stability…you will witness the growth of a child who pours that back into their world and your relationship. What you pour into your work, pours out. If you pour in…

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6 Signs of a Truly Happy Woman

Years ago I use to look at so many women and think they were so happy. I’d wonder what their secret was to having that much joy. Jacuzzi break with my spirit sistahs. Some deeply happy women, these ones. As I grew to find and experience my own joy, I took another look at those women I had admired and was surprised at what I saw. From a different vantage point, there was a hollowness in their life and an emptiness in their words. I suddenly saw the harshness of their jokes or comments (about themselves or other women) and the lack of peace that I found comes with real joy. Then as I began coaching, I spent a lot of time helping women DIG IN beneath the surface to find that ability to thrive. And as I watched them rock things out in their lives I found a few…

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Organic Wisdom :: How do others love and honor you?

Every Friday or so I intend to share some of the quotes I post on Twitter and Facebook, with some of my expanded thoughts and feelings on it here. “Organic Wisdom” is what I have found speaking to me in those quiet moments, that guides me and echoes Truth in my life. Please feel free to download, or share this image in any way you’d like. Oh man, this was a difficult one for me to embrace. But the words kept coming back to me, looking me square in the face and gently nudging me to take accountability for the relationships I helped to create. “Others will love and honor you how you love and honor yourself.” It was asking me for the raw truth, to look at how I’ve shown others my own value…not in my demands or retorts or reactions, but in my deeper responses. This was my…

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