With temps in the 90′s here, it has become apparent that fall has come. :sigh: How I’d love to watch the palm trees change color or…whatever else people do in the fall. There are things you just don’t see in my hometown. Of course, then there are things you ONLY see in my hometown. Hmm, I promised to post my full “You Know You’re From Vegas When…” list. I suppose the 2nd day of autumn is as good as any. (My friend, Arianne and I came up with at least half of these. But I deeply apologize to whoever we stole the rest from.)
You Know You’re From Vegas When…
1. You have no idea what a scarf does, but think it looks good.
2. You know how to get to any casino on the strip without taking Las Vegas Blvd.
3. You know where the natural history museum, art museum, zoo and drive-in are and rarely waste your time with them.
4. You can now predict where the construction signs will be misleadingly placed.
5. Stop signs and red lights mean very little.
6. The last time you went to the strip, your cousins were in town last summer.
7. You become nocturnal between the months of April to October.
8. You know the seasons: 2 weeks of nice, really hot, 2 weeks of cold, 2 weeks of nice.
9. Your favorite chocolate is Ethel M.
10. When you go to different cities, you’re amazed things aren’t open after 9 pm.
11. You’ve never seen a closed gas station.
12. You can get hard liquor any day of the week, any time of the day.
13. When arriving home from vacation the slot machines in McCarran are comforting.
14. You are still asked “smoking or non?” when you go to out to eat. [Whoops! Not anymore!]
15. You laugh at people playing the slots at 7-11.
16. You have no idea how a lottery works.
17. What the f*ck is “last call”?
18. Your most prized possession as a Nevadan is your blue and white license plate.
19. You know the Spaghetti Bowl has nothing to do with food.
20. You know never to merge right when driving north on I-15, it’ll end anyway.
21. You think a pile of rocks is a nice lawn.
22. The term Lake Las Vegas doesn’t seem redundant in the slightest.
23. You remember the ugly lion.
24. You give directions to your house based on the location of the closest casino.
25. You need to walk through a casino to see a movie.
26. You go in circles through McCarran on purpose.
27. You can spot a tourist from 3 miles away.
28. Limos are an everyday sighting.
29. You laugh at people taking pictures in front of the “welcome” sign.
30. You don’t own an umbrella.
31. Sixty degrees is cold enough to wear a jacket.
32. You can wear pants in the summer and shorts in the winter.
33. You’ve never HAD to pay for parking.
34. You are outraged to pay more than 9.99 for prime rib and a lobster tail.
35. You pass this on to other locals because “it’s so true”.
36. You had to explain snow to your 10 year old because they’ve never seen it.
37. You think 105 degrees is a nice day.
38. You know which hotel/casino is structurally unsafe and refuse to step foot in it.
39. You know the last name (and the nickname he was dubbed) of the guy who built said hotel/casino.
40. You know asphalt has a liquid state.
41. You know the difference between a showgirl, a stripper, and a hooker.
42. You know prostitution isn’t legal in Las Vegas.
43. You know where prostitution is legal.
44. You’re seatbelt has been used as a branding iron.
45. You know how to drive with two fingers.
46. Leather seats is NOT an option.
47. You never knew your hair was curly until you visited relatives in the south.
48. You get bored in the Entertainment Capital of the World.
49. You don’t gamble. Ever.
50. You can make instant sun tea.
51. You know you can get sunburned while driving, and not in a convertible.
52. A vehicle without air conditioning is NOT an option (but you COULD survive it).
53. The cows give evaporated milk.
54. You know oil and tanning do NOT go together.
55. It’s 90 degrees in the shade (and you actually think it’s pleasant).
56. You’re surprised to see water underneath a bridge.
57. You think it’s unusual to go out and NOT hear the familiar ding, ding, ding, ding.
58. Two or three flurries constitute a snow day.
59. Your children are mesmerized by water falling from the sky.
60. You have no idea how to drive when the roads are wet.
61. You get defensive when people talk about how hot Phoenix is.
62. You blame everything on Californians.
Be sure to read the comments for even more (or to add your own)!
My name is Tara. I am a mama and a lover, a full-time nomad, a passionate devourer of Life and an Organic Life Coach.
I came across your blog looking for Vegas blogs, coincidentally it is also a “green” blog which makes me doubly happy. That said…I want to laugh at some of these statements but I’m not sure its even funny. We are moving to Vegas in January and I wonder if some of these things are going to make me want to pull my hair out. Can I make the transition from 8 years in Europe to Las Vegas? Only time will tell.
Um. Yes. There will be many times that tempt you to pull your hair out. And you will likely have some adjusting to do. But there are many good qualities too. We don’t have many bugs. Or natural disasters. And there is the Springs Preserve. And tons of great shows on the strip. Plus you won’t be moving when it’s 112 outside. That’s a plus.
Good luck on your move!
Haha. Oh this list is going to make me cry.
Our here in the midwest our seasons are Cold, Summer, Cold, Really cold. LOL. I think we had the longest winter ever last year. I’ve been to Las Vegas tons of times, but never as an adult. We used to go there about once a year when I was in junior high and highschool. Your list was great. I think the only thing that scares me is that no ones abides by the stop signs or stop lights! Yikes!
You don’t get in the pool if it’s under 95* because it’s too cold when you get out.
You think nothing of seeing a guy in a pirate shirt or a girl in a thigh high leotard and suntan nylons doing some grocery shopping at 8 am.
Your kids don’t know what a parking meter is.
You don’t know how to parallel park.
YOu know the parking garages are never full, it’s just the valet’s way of increased compensation for working on the weekend.
You’ve eaten at some restaurant at every casino, yet never paid for a meal
[...] You’re From Vegas When…” list. But for now back to my garden. (Wait, here’s the full list as [...]
[...] (”They couldn’t hit an elephant from this distance.” ~ John B Sedgwick), to how you know you’re from Vegas. I especially love lists that allow me to cross things off, which brings me back to this list and [...]
You can’t drive on any freeway without another car (most likely an SUV) tailgating so close behind you that you can see the driver perfectly in your rearview mirror.
When you see a dentist office or two on every single street corner.
Same with chiropractor offices and nail salons.